My Life; on Anti-Depressants

Day 28

Check out my productive self, I finished editing one of my podcast episodes.  I took me a long time but now I think I’ve developed a system that should make the other ones much easier.  Plus I started with the one I knew would be the hardest so I could give myself a crash course in sound editing.  And all it took for me to do it was a little will power and for my housemates to all watch Game of Thrones and since I don’t watch it, I used the time to edit.  This is a rare example of me using my time wisely.  I now have 6 days off work where I really want to do more of just that, using my time wisely to get shit done.

It’s good to be productive.  I’m clearly never going to completely eliminate procrastination from my life, it’s too big a part of it, but when I’ve been productive my procrastination feels warranted.  I guess then, by definition it wouldn’t be procrastination so I just need to make sure I always have enough things I should be doing but also have done enough things to feel like I’ve earned my next YouTube wormhole.  The last of the filming equipment should arrive tomorrow so YouTube will soon have more of my face on it.  I’m constantly having ideas for sketches and other thing so with this camera and studio set up I should be able to put those ideas into practice, have a lot of fun doing it and learn more about video editing.  I’ve put some basic stuff together in the past like vlogs but my video editing skills definitely have ample room for improvement.  You can have the best video content in the world but if it doesn’t look and sound good then you’re losing potential viewers straight away.

I nearly forgot to take my pill again today, always a good sign.  I feel 85% back to normality right now, I know I won’t get back to 100% until I make a bigger change in my life, the factors that led up to my depression are still there for the most part but my attitude towards them has changed.  I still need them gone but my ability to deal with everything much more easily.  My anti-depressants soften the sharp edges of life so I’m able to handle it better.

Thanks for reading and I’ll speak to you tomorrow.

Jake

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