Tag: Blog

Jobless (more problems than jay-z)

So I currently don’t have a job. Other than my stand up comedy which honestly doesn’t pay enough for me to enjoy the lavish lifestyles rap videos tell me I should be aiming for. Jay-z may have had 99 problems but I feel like if one of those had been

Nonsense, inspiration and your mum. 

I haven’t written anything in a long time, and there’s probably been a multitude of reasons for that.  I’ve got a new job, before that I was on the cusp of homelessness and before that I was on the brink of suicide. What a bloody rollercoaster life is, only with

How to fix the world. 

War! Huh? What is it good for?  Well maybe, just maybe solving all the worlds problems.  “Jake that’s ridiculous” I hear you cry.  Well you’re right, it is ridiculous.  The only way war could potentially fix the world is if we were invaded by an alien species who decides the

What the fuck am I doing with my life? 

So I imagine this may sound familiar to a lot of readers (I’m fooling myself in to thinking a get “a lot of readers”), the whole question of “what do I want to do?”   The question that’s the bane of my existence, the thorn in my side, the pain

Fuck Mornings. 

Seriously, they’re horrible.  And I think, I’m not a doctor but, they might actually be killing us all.  They have to be, why else would they feel this bad!   I’m currently riding the tube in London at 7am.  My alarm went off at 6:10am (and again at 6:12am because

We’re all stupid. 

Take a second to think back to the last stupid thing that you did.  Not a tragic regret, but one that you can laugh at.  Yes, it’s hard to admit but we are all stupid sometimes and if you don’t think you are, then unfortunately you’re slightly more stupid.  It’s

Procrastinating (Adam Sandler; We’re not mad, just disappointed) 

Procrastination will be the death of me.  I swear to God my gravestone shall be engraved with “I’m meant to be doing something else”.  I procrastinate so often that I procrastinate about procrastination.  For example, I’ll decide I want to watch a movie instead of doing something constructive (like applying

My Life; on Anti-Depressants

Day 41 I think a lot.  I think about my life, my dreams and aspirations.  I think about what life is, does it have a purpose?  I don’t believe that we’re told enough to really think about what we want out of life.  I think we’re told what other people

My Life; on Anti-Depressants

Day 40 Let’s talk about mental health.  That’s a sentence I don’t think we hear enough.  As human beings I can guarantee almost every single one of us lies almost on a daily basis.  When someone asks “How are you?” and you respond with “Fine thanks”.  None of us are

My Life; on Anti-Depressants

Day 39 I’m publishing today early to avoid not doing it.  I didn’t post in my blog yesterday because I accidentally got too fucked up to stay awake.  My bad.  But today started with pancakes, bacon and maple syrup so everything in the world is good.  I’ve been at work

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